Mental models are constructs for thinking that help us make sense of the world around us. Models can act as shortcuts that save you valuable energy and time when you’re evaluating an idea, making a decision, or problem-solving. Here is one of my favorite mental models for faster and sharper decision-making and for creative problem-solving.

This might seem counterintuitive, but sometimes it’s just as important to know what not to do as what to do. This tactic is used best for directing your attention to the essentials and avoiding what doesn’t matter in the moment.

Often at the beginning of a project, or even just a packed day, it can feel overwhelming to decide what to concentrate on. The power of the not-to-do list is that you decide from the very beginning what you will definitely put aside. When we write down our list of tasks for the day, we usually don’t prioritize, nor do we assign a value to these tasks. It’s easy for a conventional to-do list to become a catchall for all the things we know we have to do that day, instead of the things that must be done first, for the most value.

Lest you think that the not-to-do list is filled with things like participating in social media, let’s work out exactly how you should compile this list:

• First, write down tasks that might be important but can’t be done because of outside circumstances. Maybe you’re waiting for an e-mail from someone else, or you’re waiting for a colleague to finish their portion of a project.
• Next, include tasks that you think need to be done but that don’t add value to your life; you might also think of these as busywork. You might ask yourself if you can delegate or hire someone else to do them. You can also ask if anyone but you will notice whether the task is left undone. The idea here is that your time is best spent on tasks that will move your life and goals forward.
• Then include current and ongoing tasks that don’t benefit from additional attention. This might include systems that are already set up, such as making the kids’ lunches or having a brief meeting with your team at the start of the work day. These are part of your routine and shouldn’t be clogging your to-do list on a daily basis.
• Last, include urgent tasks that are often to-do lists given to us by other people, such as getting some background research on a project or making follow-up calls. These are tasks that might be necessary to do but perhaps don’t need to be done by you.

When you’re finished with your don’t-do list, it should read like an anti-menu, a list of items that aren’t available for your time. You will then be able to easily identify what will actually move you forward and do those activities instead.

FINDING YOUR REASONS

When it comes to doing anything in life, reasons reap rewards. Feeling good is not required to feel motivated. How many times have we felt good on a given day and still not done what we said we would do? You could feel amazing and still get nothing done if your reasons for doing so are not strong enough.

Reasons that are tied to your purpose, identity, and values will sufficiently motivate you to act, even in the face of all of the daily obstacles that life puts in your way. The healthy 70-year-old doesn’t go to the gym at 4:35 a.m. because he likes it—he goes because maintaining his health so he can continue to be with his family is motivation enough to him, even though he would much rather sleep in. The good student doesn’t pick up her textbook because she’s in a good mood. She does it because she wants to ace that test so she has the best chances of landing the internship that will lead to her dream job.

It’s likely that there’s a good reason behind every task you need to accomplish, even the unpleasant ones. You don’t love making dinner, but you want your family to eat well and you understand the dangers of overreliance on takeout and fast food. You’re uncomfortable giving speeches, but you know that your team is relying on you to rally the whole organization behind your project at the conference. You find economics daunting and a little boring, but you need the class to get your marketing degree, and you can’t wait to put your marketing skills to work in the real world.

If you’re struggling to find motivation to accomplish something in your life, there is a good chance you haven’t uncovered the why of the task. Consider your passion, your desired identity, and your values: How can they create the basis for your reasons? You already know that you’re much more likely to remember something when you’re motivated to remember it. Conversely, if you don’t find any motivation in knowing someone’s name, you’re going to forget it as soon as you move on to your next conversation. Let’s say your passion is to help people forge better relationships, you identify as a connector, and one of your values is love. Your reasons for learning to remember names could be simple to find: “I want to learn to remember names so that I can better connect with people in my community and help foster a stronger network of people I care about.”

Having reasons has helped me become crystal clear when it comes to commitments. A big part of self-love is being protective of your time and energy. Setting boundaries around your time, emotions, mental health, and space is incredibly vital at any time, but especially when you don’t sleep. When you lack any necessary fuel, such as sleep or food, your resources aren’t as abundant as they are at other times, so protecting what you have becomes very important. When I make decisions, everything is either a heaven yes or heaven no (just trying to keep it clean here). If I don’t feel completely aligned with something, I don’t do it, because I don’t have the energy to spare. And I can honestly say that I don’t suffer from FOMO (fear of missing out). In the last few weeks I’ve been invited to a handful of social and work gatherings but declined because I’m clear about my purpose and motivation in spending time writing this book. I’d love for you to join me in celebrating JOMO—the joy of missing out.

Most of us feel tired and fatigued these days. I believe that’s because we feel like we need to say “yes” to every opportunity, invite, or request that comes our way. While it’s great to be open-minded and consider options, when you say yes to something, you need to be careful that you’re not inadvertently saying no to yourself and your own needs.

Excerpted from LIMITLESS EXPANDED EDITION by Jim Kwik published by Hay House, Inc. Copyright © 2023.