- | 8:00 am
Netflix and grieve: Inside the digital afterlife of streaming profiles
Confronted with the loss of a loved one, some people find solace in an unlikely place: Netflix’s personalized profiles.
Earlier this week, Reddit user Bloxicorn took to the site with an unusual question: Would you delete the Netflix profile of a family member who has passed away?
Bloxicorn, a college student who talked to Fast Company under the condition that we do not reveal her real name, has some personal experience with that issue: Her dad died in late 2021, and she has been occasionally looking at his profile ever since, just to see what he was watching in the days before his passing. She ultimately penned her Reddit post because she was wondering if anyone else was possibly doing the same thing. “I thought I’d get a couple comments and four upvotes,” she says.
Just hours after submitting her post to Reddit, it had gained more than 300 votes and more than 80 comments, with many other users chiming in to say that they hadn’t found themselves able to delete the profile of a lost loved one either.
“I still haven’t deleted my husband’s profile, or taken it over. It’s been almost a year and a half,” wrote one commenter.
“My mom’s been gone almost three years. I haven’t deleted any of her profiles,” added another. “I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to.”
BONDING OVER A SHARED LOVE OF TV
When Netflix first introduced profiles in 2013, the company was looking to help people with the toddler problem: Young kids could easily overwhelm Netflix’s algorithms by binge-watching one episode of Dora the Explorer after another, ruining recommendations for the rest of the family.
Profiles caught on even in households without young children and have been part of the streaming experience ever since, with competing services such as HBO Max and Disney+ all launching their own versions. Now, all of these services find themselves confronted with the reality that some of their members have passed away, leaving family members with some difficult decisions.
“My dad passed away in October,” wrote one commenter on Reddit. “It’s oddly comforting to see his profile every time I click on my HBO app. . . . Talking about TV shows that we both watched was our main way of bonding after he got sick. I’ll never remove it.”
Bloxicorn can empathize with that experience. “We watched a lot of TV together,” she says about her dad. The two of them shared a love for sci-fi, and spent hours watching shows and talking about science and math. “He (was) a big space nerd,” she says, which ultimately led her to pursue a career in the field as well.
Even for people who didn’t have that strong of a bond, streaming profiles can be comforting. As one Reddit user commented: “I have to say, as someone who did not really know their dad, I would spend a lot of time looking at the things he wanted to watch.”
MEMORIES IN THE AGE OF DIGITAL MEDIA
Rikard Steiber is not surprised at all that streaming profiles can become so meaningful after someone’s death. The former VR executive started GoodTrust, a startup that deals with both the financial and the digital aspects of someone’s estate, after his own dad passed away in 2020. One of his company’s jobs included taking care of the digital footprint of a Swedish radio host, who had amassed a lot of Spotify playlists. “The family decided not to delete the Spotify account, as this was an important part of his legacy,” Steiber says.
Digital media accounts can also play an important part in memorializing a loved one, Steiber argues. “When people wonder what music to play at someone’s funeral, it turns out that Spotify’s most-played playlists are a great source,” he says. “When wondering which picture to use for an obituary, Facebook profile pictures (are) a good call, as the person selected it themselves.”
However, for most streaming services, this issue is not necessarily front and center. “Most online companies do not have a plan for how to effectively and respectfully manage their customers who pass away,” Steiber says. “It has simply not been a problem or priority for them yet.” He suggests that companies should institute digital legacy contact solutions, which would let family members take over accounts after the original account owner passes away.
Without such solutions, it’s up to family members to figure out on their own what to do with digital media accounts and streaming profiles. In Bloxicorn’s case, the decision has ultimately been an easy one: Because her father started the account, she wouldn’t actually be able to get rid of his profile—but she would keep it even if she could. “I don’t think I (would) ever delete it,” she says.
With that, she is left wondering what her dad would have thought of the end of Squid Game and Manifest, the two Netflix shows left unfinished on his continue watching list.
This led a Reddit user to suggest a different kind of commemoration: “Maybe you could just add your name to the main profile, so it’s Dad & Bloxicorn. Finish Squid Game on his profile. Watch it together in your head.”